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Children Talking to Themselves

Barbara asked me to comment on a concern many are having; their children talking to themselves.

Why do you think that would happen?

Watch your child and consider if some of the following reasons might apply.

1. It feels good to his muscles.
2. He likes hearing the sounds.
3. Others are not doing all the talking.
4. He knows he won't be interrupted.
5. He is free to say whatever he can.
6. He enjoys practicing the new skill of sounding.
7. He is imitating how others talk.
8. He's pretending to talk to his toys.
9. He's telling a story.

So you may be surprised that there are so many positive reasons. Now the problems; Too much self talk will isolate the child and mark him as unusual and he will not be communicating.

Children often talk more to themselves than to others, with the other people dominate interaction with so much talk that the child has no chance to talk.

• The child may be discouraged fro talking since he is corrected and made to feel he's doing something wrong.
• People may not respond to the sounds he can make and so he gives up.
• People respond to his sounds with more words than he can try to do.
• People do not join into the child's play and show him how his sounds can communicate.
• People do not play with his sounds as the important developmental toys they can be.
• Children often expect others will talk for him, since they often do so.

TREAT YOUR CHILD'S SOUNDS LIKE THE MOST VALUABLE TOYS TO PLAY WITH HIM.

If he is talking to himself, get in there and accept anything he says with no corrections; your job is to teach him to be a constant social sounder who learns that any sounds will effectively get your attention.

TRY THE FOLLOWING.

• IMITATE YOUR CHILD'S SOUNDS
• PLAY WITH SOUNDS BACK AND FORTH
• TRANSLATE HIS SOUND INTO ONE WORD THAT MAKES SENSE.
• ALLOW SILENT TIME WITH YOUR CHILD; GIVE HIM TIM TO TALK.
• BELIEVE THAT "NO SOUND IS A MISTAKE" - IF YOU WANT MORE, SHOW HIM HOW
• TAKE TURNS WITH SOUNDS FOR A LONG TIME BEFORE WORRYING ABOUT WORDS. TREAT ANY SOUND LIKE A DIAMOND UNTIL YOUR CHILD IS A CONSTANT SOCIAL SOUNDER.

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Next: Turntaking -- a bit more